In which I obsess over TNNA, socks and archaeology......

It has been a while since I've blogged but I've been keeping myself busy with lots of knitting. Particularly knitting socks, reading books about knitting socks, watching YouTube videos about knitting socks. For the most part I've been fairly obsessed about knitting socks for quite some time. Earlier this year I was lucky enough to attend TNNA in San Diego where I was able to take FOUR classes with Cat Bordhi which just furthered my obsession. Now I first found out about Cat Bordhi when I picked up her books on mobius knitting, I was hooked. When she came out with her book on knitting socks with two circular needles I was intrigued.

If I had to make a list of famous knitters I would want to meet (because honestly who doesn't have a list of famous knitters they want to meet). Cat and the yarn harlot would be #1. I know technically there shouldn't be two number ones but its my list and both Cat and Stephanie are on the top of my list. That being said, getting to take classes with Cat was such an awesome experience; she was kind and friendly and so warm and approachable. Her excitement is contagious and although its been a few months since TNNA I'm still in a sock knitting state of nirvana. Toe-up, cuff down, magic-loop, DPN's, 2 circulars...doesn't matter Cat's New Pathway's book has completely liberated my perspective on how to go about knitting a sock. Not only is Cat an amazing knitter and fabulous teacher she has also written a novel by the name of Treasure Forest. As soon as I got home from TNNA I ordered it and devoured it over a few days it was fantastic. I highly recommend Treasure Forest it is a captivating story that draws you in and you can't put it down.

As I sat in Cat's classes surrounded by various knitters, designers, shop owners, and teachers I couldn't help but look around to make sure I wasn't the only one totally geeked out by meeting Cat Bordhi. I could seriously go on and on and on about how fantastic she was, how much I learned, how inspired I was etc... it was simply fabulous.

TNNA was filled with fabulous experiences and I was able to meet some amazing knitters. Cat introduced me to Clara Parkes and I tried not to make an ass out of myself. When I first started knitting I found out about Knitters Review and I was instantly hooked. While I recovered from shoulder surgery I roamed through the forums and read all the articles; while I begrudgingly worked on various graduate seminar projects for school I would turn to Knitters Review for a quick detour away from academia and post processual theoretical approaches to household archaeology (say that five times in a row). All along my knitting journey (sorry Bets I used the word journey hehehehe) I've been a big fan of Knitters Review so meeting Clara was simply cool. Now trying to explain to my husband how exciting it was to take classes from Cat, meet Clara, and then meet a TON of authors during various book signings over the course of the weekend was a tad bit challenging but he was quite happy that I had such a good time. The best part was being there with my dear friend Betsy who was equally excited about all of the various TNNA booths and knitterati.

Since TNNA I've been knitting when I can, rolling with the punches that MS throws at me and trying to settle down into my new job....retired archaeologist. I've wanted to be an archaeologist as long as I can remember and I'm blessed that for a good 10+ years I was an archaeologist. My good friend Matt likes to remind me that I'm still an archaeologist but coping with MS, new lesions, further health problems and the death of my career has been rather trying at times. There are days when I think....now what am I supposed to do.....then there are the days when I think "aren't I supposed to be thinking about what I was supposed to do, but huh? what was I thinking." I'm still on the fence as to whether the neurological problems are worse than the physical problems associated with MS so my opinion changes rather frequently. Recently as I slowly accept my current situation I am thankful for the wonderful friends and family that I have in my life and for the experiences I've had so far in my life. The great thing about knitting, and specifically knitting socks is that stitch by stitch row by row not only are you creating something useful but also something beautiful.

Currently I'm rather excited about designing my own patterns for socks and I've been having a great time agonizing over stitch patterns, taking what I've learned from Cat and knitting socks fearlessly. I never thought I would admit it, and I'm sure my archaeology friends will think I'm crazy but there is something about the process of knitting socks that is darn near as fun as archaeology without the occupational hazards of cactus, cactus, cactus, morning glory covered cactus, cactus, cactus oh and did I mention cactus? Where I spent most of my career doing fieldwork always involved cactus on some level, stepping on it, over it, moving it aside to look for sites, you name it it always involved cactus. In knitting if you make a mistake you have to rip it out, well in dealing with this particular occupational hazard of cactus you still have to rip it out. While on a sadistic level I miss the fieldwork terribly I don't miss my relationship with the cactus. Now as I settle into my current situation I'm happy that as far as the future holds I'm fairly certain it will be filled with more yarn and significantly (zero) cactus.

Keep Moving Forward......

I can hardly believe its 2009! Where do all of the days go? It amazes me how fast time goes by while you are dealing with different ever changing aspects of your life. Recently I started a different MS medication so my timeline on things have been pretty reversed. I'm hopeful that this time the progression of MS will be slowed down. After having my last MRI and seeing the progression of MS lesions in my brain from a year ago it was quite hard to face starting over on new shots and hoping that they work. Its a waiting game and can be quite overwhelming at times but I think I'm finally coping with the changes MS brings the best I can.

Craft wise I'm making as many craft messes in my house that I can. I've been knitting, spinning, painting, sewing, and general mischief making. I've been really enjoying knitting socks and have had socks on the brain for months now. For my birthday my husband got me an Ashford Joy spinning wheel and I just love it! I've been spinning more and am starting to get obsessed with rovings. I just really enjoy the creative process. I also adore catching up on blogs especially my friend Susan's blog. She is so wise and so creative, I just love her patterns!!! They challenge me and insipre me and I'm constantly wondering what she is going to come up with next.

Day by day, week by week, life trods along. With the good and the bad I try to remember a line from one of my favorite Disney movies ...."keep moving forward."

Hello...hello.....is this thing on.....

"We could never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world" -

Helen Keller

The past few months have been a whirlwind of change and I'm just slowly catching up with all that has been happening. I was just talking to a friend about how fast time flies and yet at the same time sometimes days/months/years seem like they were forever ago. It seems like last year was a lifetime ago and this year I can hardly believe its almost September. I have to catch myself and focus on the good things instead of the hard things and I'm slowly getting the hang of it.



In the past few months we've adopted two new kitties to add to our family. Our older cat has cheered up a lot now that there are kittens running around but she still takes the time to knock some sense into them and show them who's boss. Our dogs are both interested and fearful of the kittens since they tend to start running around bouncing off the furniture, your head, the dogs so that can be a little unsettling. I'm so happy to be surrounded by so many pets they are just a joy and a constant source of laughter.





There is only one horrible, terrible thing about having these two new kitties.......yarn addiction. Apparently it starts young these days because both cats are completely set on finding any and all yarn/roving/ribbon/shoe laces you name it and they are on the prowl. I watched one of the cats scale the large bookcase to get to a basket of yarn I had placed on the highest shelf. Both cats feel that my spinning wheel is the greatest bed/play area ever. While I appreciate their great appreciation of all things fiber related it makes leaving my knitting out no longer an option. One of the cats in particular has the fine taste for sock yarn and while its horrible to even think about she particularly loves Malabrigo lace yarn. She actually picked up my very first skein of Malabrigo ever in her mouth and went running behind the television. I didn't even see her do it at first but my husband said "what did she just get?" Had I known that the Malabrigo was in danger I would have raced to its rescue immediately but since I was still unaware of this cats craftiness I let my husband go after her. When he emerged holding the Malabrigo now covered in kitten drool I dare say I felt a little faint.



I've been knitting random projects here and there. I'm still slowly knitting away on Crocus Pocus. I've learned the valuable lesson of only knitting charts when MS isn't rearing its ugly head. So this project is taking me a lot longer than I anticipated but patience is a virtue right? Susan has come out with additional pattern in her Garden Varietals collection so I'm excited about tackling those once I get Crocus Pocus complete. I love her designs and her blog she is so creative and always has something profound to say. She's witty and silly and just a really cool person I love seeing her designs come together the way she incorporates beads just thrills me to no end. My dear friend Betsy is working on one of Susan's designs and it is so gorgeous.



I'm also getting back into rubber stamping/altered art. My husband has set up a very nice work table and storage area downstairs so I can craft to my hearts content without having to constantly go upstairs to get something. I have all of my stamps, inks, ribbons, glitter, etc...organized and labeled and its been really fun just playing around again. I was visiting my parents a few weeks ago and my mom took me to this store called The Stamp Addict. It was fabulous!!!!! The owner was so sweet and helpful and I was able to pick up some supplies for a few projects I've been working on. My mom isn't really into stamping but she's a big quilter and luckily there is a quilt store next to the Stamp Addict. So I could drool over the different stamps and inks and my mom could shop at the quilt store. It was a perfect combination!



Living with MS continues to be a daily struggle but I'm dealing with it the best I can. I've got to focus on looking forward instead of looking back.

Chh, chhh, chhh, changes......

Magic Carpet Ride

Ok so I really tried to work hard and just stick to one project. I was just going to knit mystic light (and maybe some socks) but I was going to wait before starting this next project but I couldn't help it. It turns out I like the yarn for mystic light more than I like the pattern. So on the positive side I actually finished two of the clues before the next clue was released which was rather interesting for me (especially with all of the yarn showing up in the mail from the Woolen Rabbit). I think I will eventually knit Mystic Light but I'll use a different yarn. It's funny how I feel guilty sometimes when I'm stopping or starting a new project. Its not like the project is going to say "hey you have to finish me first," although I swear the Magic Carpet yarn has been trying to seduce me for weeks! As soon as the beads arrived those too were totally teaming up and well, frankly I was helpless, it just happened, the beads got on the yarn and well I casted on I even may have knitted a little, not a lot...but definitely a little.

I also may have started another sock. Just one little quick and easy sock. I couldn't help it when I went upstairs to look for something else the koigu just jumped onto some needles and well the pattern pretty much knits itself...Honestly look at that koigu, how could any knitter resist it. The truth is I was going to start on this but I couldn't locate my size 0 needles, they are still being evasive so I needed something to knit while waiting to find the size 0 needles.

So there are lots of changes going on. Projects put on hold and projects started. I strung the beads for Magic Carpet (MC) yesterday and started about 10 rows of it and I was in heaven (ok so maybe I knitted a little more than previously mentioned). I also started a pair of socks with someyummy yarn so in case the MS flares up I'll have a back of easy project. So far so good.

So aside from changes in my knitting progress I've also been planning for some changes in my life. I'm constantly having to adjust or adapt to depending on my health and we (my husband and I) have recognized that where we are currently living is not exactly conducive to my mobility issues. When we bought our house I loved that it was two stories tall with high ceilings but now that I've got MS those stairs feel like a death trap and I've already fallen down them enough to know that they are just not working for me. So we are planning on moving back down to San Diego to be closer to our family and better hospitals. So in the meantime current house has turned into a construction zone. Painters, gardeners, more painting. It's been a little unsettling for me so as always I've turned to knitting to help get me through it.

I historically have not done well in adapting to change, I don't like change and normally change doesn't like me but I've learned (naturally the hard way) that not all change is bad. We need to change and as much as I hate to admit it I have learned quite a lot from periods of intense change. I'm aware each day to be thankful for everything, for my friends and family, for my pets, for my life experiences so far. I have to be thankful and enjoy each second of each day because I never know how I'm going to feel or if I'm going to be mobile or not.

The sad thing is that I would much rather give up my physical ability than to have to come to terms with the neurological dysfunction that occurs in my brain from time to time. I know that it sounds horrible to say that but for so long so much of how I saw myself was associated with my brain and my academic achievements. So it all comes back to definitions again. How do I define myself and how will I continue to change that definition. I have MS, I am not MS. I've graduated college, I've attend grad school and I hope that the time will come when I am able to complete my thesis and obtain my master's. The funny thing is a few years ago I would have considered not finishing my thesis a total failure. I would have balked at the idea of taking time off of from school and I would have pushed to just keep going. It's one of the unexpected bonuses of having fibromyalgia and MS, they band together and force you to listen to your body and slow down.

During my recent stint in the hospital I watched a lot of movies, mostly Disney and Pixar because I frankly love cartoons I can't help it they just make me smile. There is one movie Meet the Robinsons that has this phrase "keep moving forward." In the film the family views failure of an invention (or failure in general) as a positive thing. The film stresses the importance of learning from your mistakes and Keep Moving Forward.....

The definition of "me" prior to MS would view "keep moving forward" as keep moving as fast as you can as quick as you can forward, forward, forward, forward, did I mention forward and quickly? Its amazing what a little MS can do for a girl, you know?

I'm realizing that it's important to keep moving forward but its ok to stop and snuggle the yarn every once in a while. Its ok to change your mind halfway through a project and rip it out. Its ok to try harder projects that intimidate you because you aren't sure if your brain is going to be cooperating that day. Projects that in the past you would have felt no unease fear may take me a little longer now but it still only comes down to one stitch at a time. One stitch forward, maybe a few stitches ripped back and I'm realizing that it isn't so much as important to me for every single thing in my life to be wrangled and controlled. As much as I have spent the majority of my life being a total type A over achieving control freak I'm realizing that my body (with its very challenges) in its own way is being its on over achiever just not in the way that I would have chosen.

New paint on the inside and the outside of my current house makes me change perspective a little. Some of the cracks and bruises have been patched and painted but its still home. The colors may have changed but the integrity of the home stays in tact. While one project has been set aside another one is providing challenge and joy. Moving will be a process but the end result will be so worth it because we'll be surrounded by our family. Family is important and when the chips are down I know that I've got a great family that loves and supports us.

"The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. -- Charles Dubois"

Knit, knit, tink, tink, tink...

So once Adara was finished it was time for the mystic light KAL. Somehow, miraculously I have managed to finish each clue prior to the next clue being released. I'm determined to finish this project for purely selfish reasons. The sooner I finish the clue the sooner I can start on the Magic Carpet Ride pattern. I finished clue 2 a day early and when I went to start Magic Carpet and I couldn't find my darn beading needle.

So I searched.......

and I searched.....






and I searched......







Then I gave up searching and vowed to work on my mystery shawl (MS3) which I stopped mid-way through that KAL. The problem is I could find the second skein of yarn, I could find the charts and the pattern but I couldn't find MS3 on the needles anywhere.






So I searched.....






and I searched.....






and I searched........






I found MS3 (still on the needles) but then I couldn't find the beads. I was going to start searching again but I realized I was searching more than I was knitting and I had a perfectly good sock to work on.








So I went downstairs and picked up my sock and managed to make it all the way down to the heel flap. I was glad that I had "accomplished" something since all of my searching didn't turn up what I needed.







I wake up the next morning and go into my craft room determined to find what I was missing and there they are.....the beading needle........and the mystery shawl beads.....right on top of my in plain view. I laughed so hard. It is so fitting that some times you search so hard for something that was right in front of you in the beginning.







So I guess the moral of the story is....if you practiced knitting project monogamy you wouldn't have to worry about lost beading needles or missing mystery shawl beads...hehehehe










Oh and to make matters better this project and this project showed up in the mail......The yarn as always is to die for!!! Oh and the dynamic duo Kim and Susan did it again with this. I'm so excited and inspired.








In the midst of all of this searching and knitting I've begun to learn a lot about myself as a knitter. Before I would just "muscle through" some patterns just to finish them. Now I'm appreciated each pattern I select. I like knowing a little bit about the designer. I like to know a little bit about the person behind the yarn. All of those tidbits of information make each project that much more enjoyable. I've even been known to (tink) back some of my knitting instead of my normal just K2tog and keep on moving. Sometimes tinking can be as fun as knitting (note that is said "sometimes") For the times when its not fun there are always cupcakes. Cupcakes make just about anything better.











I'm learning understand a lot more about fixing mistakes than I gave myself credit for. I love knitting lace even though it once (mystery shawl project) got me such in a tizzy that I stopped. I've vowed to stop stopping so I am eager to finish the mystery shawl (of course after I finish the newly arrived projects) I wouldn't want to offend the new yarn.









Once again I am learning so much about myself all while cherishing every knit or tink of these projects.

You can't have the rainbow without having the rain.....

I had to keep reminding myself these past couple of weeks that "you can't have rainbows without having the rain." I've finally finished my Rainbow shawl and I love it!!! It serves as a visual reminder so that when times get tough, or my body decides to mutiny against me I can wrap myself in color and know that everything will be all right.

I learned a lot during this knitting project. I'm normally more concerned with getting something done or starting something else. I can get pretty distracted and certainly my MS flare-up doesn't help with staying on task. Not to mention while I was knitting the Adara rainbow shawl project this came out so I promptly got the pattern and then went to my LYS with my Christmas gift certificate in hand to get the yarn. Then in the midst of my future knitting planning this came out. All I can say is WOW!!!! I purchased the kit from Kim (who is so very talented and quite nice) and when the yarn arrived I almost cartwheeled through my house (my current lack of intense mobility hindered the ability to cartwheel physically, but mentally I was cartwheeling around the block!). The yarn is so beautiful and both projects are amazing. Needless to say I'm quite obsessed with both the shawl and the scarf especially since there are lots and lots of beads incorporated into the pattern!!! I love beads almost as much as I love yarn so both of these projects have me in a knitting frenzy.

It clearly would have been easy to get distracted but I just kept on knitting my rainbow shawl one stitch at a time. I kept telling myself that as soon as I finished this shawl I could start on one of Susan's projects. She is such an amazing designer and the projects she has "in the works" just blow my mind. I love the fact that not only are her patterns gorgeous but she is also super nice and very active in the forums on Ravelry. It is so nice to like the patterns and the person!

So in the midst of this Rainbow shawl I definitely hit a rough patch of stormy weather and I think it is a small miracle that I didn't abandon the rainbow shawl when I came home from the hospital. The vibrant colors of this shawl really called to me and I was itching to get back to it while I was sick. Even though my knitting was a bit slower it still only needed one stitch at a time. So slowly but surely I continued the project. I'm also thankful that my physical and occupational therapists both thought knitting was a good idea and I've already had my knitting speed back up to its normal pace.

I just had to keep reminding myself that you can't have the rainbow without the rain so even though I hit a rough patch the sky has begun to clear I can enjoy the rainbow in front of me. Now the only dilemma is which project to start next!!

Creativity Edition - Carnival of MS Bloggers

I recently blogged about definitions and how the definitions of myself change almost constantly. Through these changes I am always aware of the opportunity for growth, even if I experience some growing pains. We'll I'm proud to announce that this weeks edition of the Carnival of MS Bloggers is focused on Creativity. I'm proud to be a contributor to this weeks issue and I enjoyed learning about other people with MS and how creativity helps them. So check it out, learn about other crafts, learn a little bit about MS. Either way you are guaranteed to learn something! So check it out, discover some new blogs, make some new friends, either way you won't be disappointed.